This is despite the fact that I fell off the stairs last night. I was looking at the route for the 10k run while walking down the stairs and I missed one step. I twisted my ankle and I was so afraid that I won't be able to run today. Before I went to bed last night, my friend massaged it a bit but it was still painful. I was even restless in my sleep because I could feel it pulsating and it was more painful than before I went to bed. But then I dreamed about you just before I woke up. Someone apparently told me that you're always with us. I could see in my dream that you were always beside Ading Linus wherever he went. But you were not talking as usual. You were just looking at whatever he was doing. I don't know how that dream ended because I can't remember anything apart from that. When I woke up around 7 this morning, I was surprised that my foot was not painful anymore. I would love to believe that you helped my foot to get better so I could run for you. And for that, thank you.
My first ever marathon went pretty well. I was not that tired when I finished but there was one point where I wanted to stop running and just walk. But then you did the trick on me again and played your song "Lighters" so I had to carry on. By the time your song finished, I was almost at the finish line. I kept telling myself not to give up because I know you wouldn't have liked me to. So I managed to keep my pace until I finished. Daddy wanted me to sprint in the the last three minutes of my run, but I didn't have any more energy to do that. I was getting tired and I was so hungry. But thinking about it know, maybe I should have. Because if I did, I would have finished in less than an hour. Now I know what to do next time.
All throughout my run, your songs were playing in my ears. I was singing along in my head and was constantly thinking about you. I really shouldn't be doing this now that you're no longer here, I was thinking. But then that is also the reason why I am doing this. If you didn't go, there is no way I would have been motivated in running a marathon. It's just sad that you had to go before I can get myself into things like this. Perhaps that's how it is sometimes. But thank you anak for inspiring me. As I said before, you are the only reason why I am now doing the things that I have never done before.
Meow did well also. When we finished, someone asked how long did it take Meow to finish. At that time, I thought it was 1 hour and 4 minutes. But when I checked my time online, it was only 1 hour and 59 seconds. I am so proud of us because I was expecting to finish in at least 1 hour 20 minutes. I exceeded my own expectations. After all, the Mc Donald's that I ate yesterday was all worth it. Haha.
I hope you're proud of us too. Daddy ran just so he could take pictures of me and Meow while running. I thank your Daddy for his encouragement and support. He's good at pushing me to do better. And please thank God for keeping me safe and looking after me.
This has been my best achievement since you left me. And as much as I am heartbroken because you're now gone, I know that you are always there for me. I love you baby.
Thinking about you all the time. Missing you.x
Mommy Tintin
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