First Day Out Without You

Before I came back to London, your Mama told me that we could actually visit CASA San Miguel, where you first learned how to play the violin, and where you would go for your art classes every Sunday. It so happened that on the day that we planned to go there, some of your friends had lunch at home. That was the day before your Daddy Don and I left. So we all got into your Daddy's van and off we went.

I was tearful when we arrived in CASA. I asked myself, "why did I only come here now that Keith Ashley is gone?". But then I realized that I have only come home once since you started school there. And that was last year. To be honest with you, CASA is one of the most beautiful places I have seen (in Zambales). Not that I have been to many, but I am really glad that you and your Adings (younger siblings) went there. Your Mama told me a lot of stories about your stay at the CASA- where you would normally hang out before your classes, where you would watch Ma'am Plet do her work and where you would play with your Adings and your CASA friends. I was trying to picture you in my head all that time. And then as I walked towards the cafe, I heard some violins playing. That brought tears to my eyes, only because I really didn't hear you play the violin LIVE, only on videos that your Mama would post on Facebook. I so wanted to watch you on your recitals, but I was so far away. But at least I still have the videos.

I also met some of your teachers, both in Violin and in Art. I don't know Keith, but somehow you're making a way for us to see more of the beautiful things and people that we have not seen or met before. It would have been the best if you were still with us. But I know this is your way of telling us that you're actually still with us, maybe not physically but in spirit (just like Jesus). 

You know that your Daddy Don is passionate about art and music, right? So when Teacher Zaniel told us that we could possibly meet one of the renowned artists from the Philippines, we didn't hesitate. Your Daddy Don was most excited because although he is knowledgeable about foreign artists, he actually doesn't know much about local artists. So it was our pleasure and honour to have met not only Teacher Zaniel, but also Mr. Elmer Borlongan.

Then we also met some of your violin teachers and classmates. Some of them came to play the violin with Sir Coke Bolipata at your wake actually. One of them really stood out for me. I later found out that it was Julian Duque, the Promil's Gifted Child and a former child actor. I was so honoured to have met him, and thanks to you anak. 

Then Ate Lucy took us on a guided tour. I finally saw the stage where you and your Ading Linus would have your recitals. How I wish I've watched you in person though.

I then took photos of the place and there was one area that caught my attention. I took a photo of it thinking that you would have loved to paint it as I know you loved bright colours. 

While at the CASA, I asked your Ading Linus if he would like to carry on playing the violin. He told me not anymore. But he would like to continue playing the piano with Ading Cxyrelle. I told him he could have his piano lessons at the CASA, but he said he would stick with Auntie Diana for now. I asked him why, but he said nothing. He may have another reason, but I left it at that. One day perhaps he'll tell me why. I would love him to continue playing the violin for you, but in time. 

After our trip to the CASA, we dropped by your new house on earth (because I know you have a better one in heaven). Your friends were happy to see you. They were waking you up to play. It broke my heart to be honest, but it was a joy to see how much they were missing you and how much they wanted you to play with them.

By the way, few days before we visited CASA, we went to SM Olongapo. As usual, Ading Cxyrelle bought a lot of stuff- one thing that you apparently didn't approve of. Your Mama told me that you would tell Kika off if she tries to buy more than what she needed. She wanted to buy loads of Barbie stuff, but when we told her Kuya Keith was getting angry at her, she returned some of them. She settled with a doll which she named Jasmine.

Then we went to Jollibee for merienda. It was your Adings' and your Mama's first fastfood treat without you.

I may have written a lot today, but I hope you didn't get that bored. I just wanted to share our experiences with you, as you will always be a part of them.

It's time to go out again now. The weather is kinda good. The sun is out and shining bright. Please remember that you will always be loved and remembered.

Mommy Tintin