Your prediction

It's raining very hard in the Philippines right now and a lot of places have been flooded. I didn't realize how bad the situation is until I logged on facebook. A lot of my friends have posted photos of the flood. I have also spoken to Inang and Mama and they told me that the water has reached our house. Ading Cxyrelle was playing in the water, while Ading Linus was still at Tito JL's. Tatang's home for a change. I'm sure you're glad about that.

Inang sounds a bit worried because of your prediction. You apparently told her before you left that this year may be the end of the world and there will be a lot of water. Perhaps you said it innocently, but with what's going on in the country right now, people are thinking of the worst thing that can happen. Inang has been telling people about what you told her and they all thought that maybe you had the sixth sense. Maybe. You have always been so mysterious. I know you had a gift, but I am not sure what it was.

You witnessed the flood last year so you probably know how bad it can get. And it looks like the situation is worse this time than last year. It has been raining for the whole week, Inang said. I heard that the bridge in Castillejos has split into two and the Maculcol bridge is starting to crack. Our town officials are also considering to open the dam to let the water out because otherwise it will break. The consequence is that at least four towns will be drowned, including our town. This is really making me so nervous.

I have told Inang to bring Tatang's ladder on the second floor just in case the water gets really high. They have put your paintings into safety as well. I'm glad they know what they need to do.

Please watch over our family and friends anak and those who are greatly affected by the flood. Please pray for them. Tell Papa Jesus to keep everyone in the Philippines safe.

I miss you my angel. Love you to bits.

Mommy Tintin

Kuya Keith

I love it when I hear your Adings and other children call you Kuya Keith. I don't know but it has been a music to my ear. At your wake, small children talked about you, their Kuya Keith like they knew you very well. Comments like " Ang bait ni Kuya Keith. Ang galing talagang mag-paint ni Kuya Keith. Sana maging katulad ako ni Kuya Keith" melted my heart. To know that kids looked up to you is priceless. You have done a good job anak.

As Kuya to Ading Linus and Ading Cxyrelle, I know you were the best they could have. I know you used to tease them a lot and even made them cry (in a good way), but I also know that you loved them very much. You were selfless, always willing to sacrifice for your Adings. You were not one to necessarily ask for anything from anyone. But when your Adings asked anything from you, you would give it to them without hesitation. When Mama asked you if Ading could have what you had, you would just say, "It's okay po". Most of the time, you argue with your Adings only  because you tease them a lot and sometimes they get too sensitive, especially Ading Linus. I don't think you ever fought with them. You were very patient and tolerant when it comes to them. 

One thing that I really admire about you as a big brother is how you looked after them and never wanted to leave them. Well, you left them in the end, but what I am saying is, you wouldn't want to go anywhere without them. Remember, you didn't want to come with me to England because you didn't want to leave them?  Ah, how I wish things didn't happen the way they did. 

Just like me and your Papa, you never addressed your Adings by their first names. You have always called them Ading, well apart from calling Ading Cxyrelle Kika, which was your form of endearment towards her.

You certainly had so many memories with your Adings. You were their bestfriend. And they love you and miss you very much.

I miss you Kuya Keith. I love you with all my heart.

Mommy Tintin

Keith the student

I really didn't meet any of your teachers until you left. Mama used to tell me that all your teachers, from nursery to grade school were so fond of you. I managed to speak to Sir Jeff briefly at your wake, but we were both too emotional to talk about anything. But I could see from his face and could hear from his voice the regret of losing one of his students. A lot of the other teachers came up to me and told me how good you were as a student. They all admired you for being so prim and proper. Never did I hear once that you were naughty. One of them wondered why your uniform never get wrinkled after a whole day in school, while other students do. They all knew you as the boy who painted and drew so well. The very handsome boy. Very quiet in the class. Even Sister Enol was so fond of you. I found out that since you were in kindergarten (I think), she has been asking you to paint Jesus's face for her. But I don't think you managed to do that. It would be really nice to find out more about you as a student. Perhaps when I go home, I can spend time with Sir Jeff and Teacher Nhica so we can talk about you a little bit more.

At your send off, Sir Jeff couldn't contain his emotions. He was crying all the way even when he delivered his eulogy. And here's what he had to say:

" Sa pagkakakilala ko kay Keith, siya ay isang napakabait at tahimik na bata. Hindi siya marunong makipagaway. Ang kanyang pagpanaw ay wala sa hinagap nating lahat na ito ay mangyayari. Noong una kong malaman ang balita hindi ko maiwasang lumuha. Sino ba naman ang agad maniniwala na sa isang iglap lang ay wala na ang mabait mong estudyante. Inisip ko ang dami daming masasamang tao sa mundo bakit si Keith pa ang unang kinuha. Napakabata pa niya. Marami pa siyang mga pangarap sa buhay. Siguro ito ang misteryo ng buhay. Sa bawat pagluha ay may katumbas na ngiti. Sa bawat pait ay may katumbas na tamis. Sa bawat pagpanaw ay may katumbas na buhay. Hindi pa natin alam sa ngayon ang dahilan kung bakit maagang kinuha ng Diyos ang pinakamamahal nating si Keith pero darating din ang araw na malalaman natin ang kasagutan. Hindi natin hawak ang ating buhay. Tanging ang Diyos lang ang nakakaalam kung hanggang kailan tayo dito sa mundo. In behalf of Saint Columban's Montessori School Faculty and staff lubos kaming nakikiramay sa mga naulila ni Keith. Sana ang paglisan ni Keith ay hindi maging dahilan ng pagkawasak ng kanilang mundo kundi maging daan upang mas lalo pang tumatag ang kanilang pamilya. Sa iyo Keith, hindi ka namin malilimutan. Mahal na mahal ka namin sampu ng iyong mga kamag-aral. Alam namin na masaya ka na sa piling ng Lumikha. Katulad ng paborito mong awiting "Lighters", nawa ikaw ay magsilbing tala na gagabay sa aming lahat lalong lalo na sa iyong pamilya."

It gives me a really heavy heart going back to these eulogies, but they are so beautiful and very touching. And since it's going to be your first angel birthday soon, it would be nice to share but other people thought about and your passing.

I am missing you so much anak. I love you ha.

Mommy Tintin

Keith as a classmate

At your wake, a lot of people came to see you. Most of them I have never even seen before. They all had beautiful things to say about you. Some of them knew you because of what other people have told them, mainly their sons, daughters and grandchildren. The goodness of your heart reached even those whom our family didn't know. From grade school to high school (even those from other schools), they all knew you. And there's one thing to prove that you were indeed that special child.

Your friend Frederick, being the president of your class gave his eulogy and it was one of the best eulogies I have heard. That moment is very clear in my head but I'd rather not say anything today as I am sure it will start me off. But here's what Frederick had to say:

PAALAM KEITH, PAALAM KAIBIGAN...

"Limang taon na ang nakalipas mula nang makilala kita. Isang batang tahimik, maamo ang mukha, matalino, magaling magdrawing at mabait. Mga katangian na hinahangaan ng karamihan at ipinagmamalaki ng iyong mga magulang. Napakaswerte nila dahil nagkaroon sila ng isang anak na tulad mo.

Bakit ikaw pa? Mahirap isipin at tanggapin na hindi ka na namin makakasama. Hindi na tayo kumpleto dahil parte ka ng bawat saya, lungkot at tagumpay ng ating klase. Ikaw ang isa sa nagbigay ng halimbawa sa salitang katahimikan at kabaitan. Sana sa iyong pag-alis maipamahagi mo ito at matutunan ito ng bawat isa sa amin. Ikaw na ang anghel namin sa langit na magpapaalala at gagabay sa amin. Sa bawat pagsubok na aming haharapin aming tatandaan ang lagi mong sinasabi "KAYA KO PO, AKO PA!". Ikaw ang aming magiging inspirasyon upang makaya naming abutin ang aming mga pangarap.

Salamat Keith...salamat sa mga alaalang iiwan mo sa amin. Mawala ka man ngayon sa piling namin, hindi ka mawawala sa aming puso kailanman dahil bahagi ka ng aming buhay. Mahal na mahal ka namin.

Paalam, Keith...paalam kaibigan..."

(Goodbye Keith... Goodbye my friend...

It's been five years since I've met you. A child who was very quiet, gentle face, intelligent, good at drawing and kind. Traits that a lot of people admire and your parents are proud of. They are very lucky that they had a son like you.

Why you? It's hard to think and accept that you're no longer with us. We are now incomplete because you have been a part of our class's every happiness, loneliness and success. You were one of those who gave us the example of quietness and kindness. I hope when you leave you'll be able to share this and for each one of us to learn from it. You are now our angel in heaven who will remind us and will guide us. In every challenge that we face, we will remember what you have always said, "I can do it". You will be our inspiration for us to reach our dreams.

Thank you Keith...Thank you for all the memories you've left behind. You may be gone but you'll never leave our hearts because you are a part of our lives. We love you very much.

Goodbye Keith...Goodbye my friend..."

I love you anak. You have made us all so proud. We miss you.

Mommy Tintin

Keith as a friend

So today I decided to read your friends' letters to you when you left. They wanted you to take those letters, but I asked them if I could keep it instead, so that I could read them whenever I am missing you and missing them. I have read them a few times since I got them, all the time those letters made me cry. I know some of your friends will not approve of me sharing those letters with you , but  I am deeply touched by their love and friendship, and therefore would like to share it with people that read my letters to you. Besides I am not going to say who wrote what, so I guess it will be fine.

There is this letter on a green piece of paper folded into three. And in the middle is written the acronym  "JJAKED". It turned out that this was you and your friends initials put together. Inside it says,

" Dear Keith, I know na nagsama tayong dalawa ng isang taon. Alam ko para sa'yo maganda ang pagsasamahan nating 6 magkakaibigan. Maganda rin ang paglalaro natin ng computer at paglaro kung ano pang magandang laro. Keith I'm sorry to say weak ka, magpalakas ka muna sana. Patawarin mo rin ako. Alam kong masaya ka ngayon sa iyong kinalalagyan. Alalahanin mo rin kami ngayon na nasa heaven ka na. Keith we will miss you and your family." - Tropang Samahan JJAKED

(Dear Keith, I know we were together for one year. I know for you, we had a beautiful friendship, the 6 of us. It was also good playing the computer and other beautiful games. Keith I'm sorry to say you're weak, you should have gained strength first. Please forgive me. I know you're happy wherever you are. Please remember us now that you're in heaven. Keith we will miss you and your family.)

Here are the other letters that your friends wrote:

" Dear Keith, we have been friends for two years. At matagal na rin ang pinagsamahan nating magkabarkada. Together with D, E, J, A and me and our other classmates. And Keith, you have always been like a brother to me. And even though you are already dead, even though your life is short, we will never forget you as a friend. Wish you are happy in heaven at sana hindi mo rin kami malimutan (and I hope you will not forget us also). And I'll always pray for you kahit wala ka na." - From your best friend

"Dear Keith, mamimiss namin ikaw kasi matalino ka at tahimik ka sa class. Naging kaibigan kita magmula 1st grade hanggang 5th grade at sorry sa mga ginawa kong masama sa'yo. Hindi namin ikaw makakalimutan. Sana hindi na lang ikaw namatay dahil kailangan ka namin. Ikaw kasi mahal na mahal ka namin lahat pati mga teacher."

(Dear Keith, we will miss you because you are intelligent and quiet in the class. You were my friend from 1st grade until 5th grade, and I'm sorry for all the wrong things that I have done to you. We will never forget you. I wish it wasn't you who died because we need you. Becase you, we all love you even the teachers.)

"Kaibigan, kung nasaan ka man gusto ko malaman mo na mahal na mahal kita. Sa lahat ng naitulong mo sa akin salamat. Thank you rin kasi naging part ka ng buhay ko at buhay naming lahat na nagmamahal sa,yo."

(Friend, wherever you are, I want you to know that I love you very much. For everything that you've done for me, thank you. Thank you also for being a part of my life and all those who love you.)

And here's a letter that really touched my heart. So innocent yet so meaningful.

"Dear Keith, alam mo sana hindi ka na lang namatay. Unfair ka, nangiiwan. Hindi pa nga ako nakakapagsorry sa'yo eh tapos umalis ka na agad. Sorry Keith, sorry. Sana mapatawad mo ako. Sorry Keith. I hope you to be peaceful when you're gonna be "ibuburol". I wish that you could go back to life so that you will have the chance to enjoy your life, your youth, your everything. I wished that the day that you will be my friend would come soon....But you didn't gave me that chance. I wish I was there when you were weak. I wish that our battle was ended when we graduate from Grade III. You were my friend for three years.I wished to God that you would be my friend forever. Oh how I wished to be your friend, crush, best friend. Sana lagi ka na lang andito. Sana hindi ka na lang umalis. Pero kahit ganoon mahal pa rin kita. Andito ka lagi sa puso namin. Maalala ko pa nung dinala niyo ni Aga yung violin niyo. Alam mo kung nasaan ka man, alam ko masaya ka. Sana maalala mo pa yung time na masaya tayong magkakaklase, mahal na mahal ka namin.Huwag mong isipin na nag-iisa ka. Andito kaming lahat karamay mo kami lagi. Hindi ka namin iiwan kahit wala ka na. At kahit wala ka na nananatili kang buhay sa aming mga isipan at mga puso. Mahal na mahal ka namin. Huwag kang mag-alala hinding hindi kami bibitaw sa'yo. Hinding hindi ka namin makakalimutan Keith. Mahal na mahal ka namin. Salamat sa konting oras na nakasama ka namin. Paalam."


(Dear Keith, you know you shouldn't have died. You're unfair for leaving us. I haven't even said sorry and then you left too soon. Sorry Keith, sorry. I hope you can forgive me. Sorry Keith. I hope you to be peaceful at your funeral. I wish that you could go back to life so that you will have the chance to enjoy your life, your youth, your everything. I wished that the day that you will be my friend woud come soon... But you didn't gave me that chance. I wish I was there when you were weak. I wish that our battle was ended when we graduate from Grade II. You were my friend for three years. I wished to God that you would be my friend forever. Oh how I wished to be your friend, crush, best friend. How I wish you're always here. I hope you didn't leave. But I still love you. You're always here in our hearts. I can still remember when you and Aga brought your violin. You know wherever you are, I know you're happy. I hope you still remember those times when we are happy, we love you very much. DOn't think that you're alone. We're always here for you. We will not leave you even if you're no longer here. And even if you're gone, you remain alive in our hearts and in our minds. We love you very much. Don't worry, we will never let you go. We will never forget you Keith. We love you very much. Thank you for the short time that we spent with you. Good bye.)

And I am crying again..... I am crying because I realized that you are such a big loss, and that you were loved by your friends.

I guess this is enough for me to be so proud of you. I know your friends miss you too. But I miss you more. I love so much anak.

Mommy Tintin

Keith the not so Little Helper

Rainy days are here again and I am sure Inang is missing you so much. Inang has been telling me that there's no one to help her get rid of the water in the house anymore when it floods. I bet this was one thing that you loved doing because it's more fun than any other household chores and you got to play in the rain as well.

I am glad that Mama took a photo of you scooping water out of our house. Precious memories.

Maybe you're not the most industrious child I know, but you were definitely a little helper. I remember when I called one time, Mama was scolding your Adings for disturbing you while you were cleaning your bedroom. I was so proud of you for doing that, because according to Inang it's not always easy to make you do anything. :)

There was also one time when someone asked you and another child to carry a case of coca-cola. I was so offended that I told them not to ask you to carry a heavy load again, because we were not asked to do anything like that when we were children. I don't know but I never imagined you or your Adings doing any household work at your age. But saying that, Papa and I started cooking and cleaning the house when we were in grade school.

I am also aware that you sometimes helped Inang clean our backyard. I also found out few months before you left that you were already able to fry eggs for yourself and your Adings.

I am just proud that you were responsible enough to do all those things. I was kind of reassured that you would have been able to look after yourself well.

I wonder if you're also doing any chores where you are. I am missing you so much and I love you.


Mommy Tintin

16 days from now

It's the 1st of August and I am dreading to think that 16 days from now, it will be your first angel birthday. How are we going to celebrate it without you? Of course we will, but I am sure it is going to be different, much much different from the eleven August 17's that we had in our lives. I know you would rather see us happy that day, so we will try our best to think of just the happy moments that we shared together. It's gonna be hard but we will try. But I am not going to make any promises that there will be no tears because I know there will be.

As much as you were special to us when you were still around, I didn't realize that I am capable of doing things that are even more special, only for you. They're right in saying that you'll never really realize how important a person is until they're gone. I sometimes ask myself why I am doing all this? What's the point, you're no longer here? Why didn't I do this when you were still here? But again, I didn't have any reason to do anything then, because I was confident that if only you lived longer, you will one day be famous in you're own right- because you were a good boy, you were talented, you had a very pleasant personality and you had the looks. You were the whole package and I know you would have gone far. I believed in you. I could see you having your first art exhibition, selling your first art-piece and then more, your first recital as a full-pledged musician, traveling the world with me and Daddy Don and your siblings, being recognized for all the good things that you have done and my list can definitely go on and on and on.

What I am trying to say really is that I want the whole world to know how wonderful you were. And I don't want people to forget you. That's all I really want.

So, this August (until your birthday at least), I want to write things that most people don't know about you. Don't worry anak, there will be nothing to be ashamed of, only to laugh about. So, I hope you won't mind me sharing your little secrets to the world. :)

I know I have written quite a lot about you already, but I will never get tired of doing it. I don't care if people will eventually get tired of reading stuff about you. I know I have been and will always be stage mom, and I am proud of it.

I love you so much anak and I am missing you more than ever before.

Mommy Tintin